I Am My Own Jillian

That 25 minutes on the treadmill is pure torture.  I wonder if people love running while they are actually doing it.  I love it when it is over, the sense of accomplishment.  I have to PUSH hard to get through it.  I am my very own Jillian Michaels yelling at myself to keep going.  I have a nonstop commentary in my head the whole time.   I wish I could zone out, but I am thinking of quitting every moment, so I persist with the aid of self-talk.

"You want to quit?  Seriously?"  What hurts?  Nothing??????  Keep going then!"
"You are half-way done.  You still want to quit?  How do you want to feel when this is done?  Defeated or like you won?"
"You can do it.  You are physically able to do it.  Break the mental barriers damn it! It is all in the mind!"
"You want to stop just because it is hard?  Yes, it is hard, so what?"
"If you can do this, run a 5K, do what you thought impossible, then you can do anything.  So DO IT!  Prove it to yourself!"
"Three more minutes.  You can do anything for three minutes! Just one more minute!  One more! Go!"

The running isn't mainly about weight loss for me.  It is a part of it, yes, but I could do any exercise.  The running is about breaking down barriers, knocking down walls, pushing past what I think I can do, achieving a goal.  It is so much more than running.  As I encouraged myself today, it occurred to me that I am my own motivator--my own Jillian Michaels.

PUSH!!!!

"Why choose failure when success is an option?" Jillian Michaels